Melody Joy Letford
The smoke was thick as thieves at the Johnny Mac Saloon down by the
swamps. Johnny didn’t mind us smoking in his joint because he knew the
cops were either too lazy or too scared to drop in, although we all knew it
was the later. Anyway it was a great place to hang after a long day of
It was a bad time for us crocodiles , food was scarce, I still can’t
believe I even had to resorted to eating my cousin Barb’s new born
babes while I was babysitting just last week. I knew she’d never talk
to me again but what did I care, just one less Christmas card to write.
I was belly up to the bar drinking my troubles away reminiscing about
Elsie, my late wife. She just picked up one day decided she wanted the
city life, said she wanted to make something of herself in the big
‘ole city of New York. Well I guess she got what she wanted in some
sad way , she made something of herself alright, She got herself made
into a fancy purse for some snooty lawyer lady on the upper east
side. Poor sweet, naïve Elsie.
Just as I asked Johnny to hit me again, she walked in, legs up to her ears
and eyes as big a s cow patties. An absolute face of a doe, a
deer, she was a female deer alright. All eyes were on her
and every tooth was dripping with saliva, they all wanted a piece of her .
She was the all you could eat buffet only she didn’t know it
yet. The dame was obviously lost , before the smoke could clear
I whisked her out the back door, she didn’t try to fight me because the
moment our eyes met, we had chemistry, and I mean the crazy fireworks kind
of chemistry you only experience once in a lifetime.
It wasn’t long after that we were married, me the one with the words “Never
Again” tattooed on my upper bicep. Go figure, I guess love really is
blind, anyway we had a lovely honeymoon along the shores of the
That would a great ending to any fairy tale right there but that ain’t my
story. You see travelling home I began to realize I hadn’t eaten
a thing since our courtship began, guess you could say I was living on love
or something like that. I could of ate the back end of a baboon at
To make a long story short, if you’ve never tried venison, you really
should, that stuff’s freaking amazing!!
All rights belong to its author. It was published on e-Stories.org by demand of Melody Joy Letford.
Published on e-Stories.org on 20.02.2010.