Broken dreams (21)
So much Ralph also tried to make clear the three one as important it was to him that he would be present on the other side also by the preparations, so much he bumped into opposition. They were still persuaded that he needed all time of the world for the grief and for the child, one said it him though over and over again, but he reacted only indignantly, irritated, got into the habit of drinking in the evening. She took only very harmless things like cocktails, wines, beer when him, however, Sgrumie found in society of a cognac bottle them from him from the hand. “Thus this does not go on, I try to talk once again with Madleine and RF, will explain to them that you go without work, as you know them, to reason and because crazily I I certainly not if I state it am in such a way. I wished only, you would know what you do to yourself, it is too early there for you, one cannot know, whether.” “I will not stay here and leave only to You the other, alternately I look around.” To him fell one that neither he nor Marianne had thought to a name for the boy and this made him affected, nevertheless, a name should be the first? “I will look furthermore after Pieter and alternately also around that what we plan if gives it we also for me.” She heard not only discontent out, also doubt about herself. He really did not know what still everything would become to come on him especially on the other side.
Madleine and RF seemed to have even bigger doubts than he, they insisted on the fact that he endured at least 2 other weeks, before he joined to them. They could not see in his inside and here it would have been better, they would have been capable of it.
Of course he understood the worry about him, she became bit by bit tiresome to him, however, it was not this only. It fell to him from day to day though lighter to look after his child, but in the same breath heavier, to concentrate upon those things which would be maybe important as those thoughts to which he devoted himself which stormed almost at him he recognised Marianne again who wanted to say something him. He watched out to speak loudly, this was also unnecessary, Marianne explained her reasons to him, why she wanted to die. “You would still have had to talk with me.” “What would have this brought?” “Maybe doctors could still have helped.” “I have questioned all doctors whom I knew.” “Yes which YOU knew, I would have given you other addresses where you could still have gone and have to go.” “It is too late for reproaches and you know this.” “I slowly have the feeling, you wanted rather before me, to the life with me and the child flee because you did not love me any more.” “If you are sure there in such a way, becomes I cannot persuade you of the opposite, as a soul this does not go.” Marianne `s soul still tried to persuade him further of it, how much he was wrong. They agreed on the fact that she had loved him about everything, but her pains had lost every tolerable litre of beer, so that also the search for other doctors would have shown rather a load for them both. “Only that I have never found out somewhat from your illness.” This and more than all other injured him even now too much, more than he could express...
Madleine wanted to turn on the 4th day to Sgrumies inquiry to him and searched him in the room of the child, however, found only the nurse. “Have you seen the father?” “No, honoured woman, man has proceeded 5 hours ago on his room to rest.” This formality had wanted Sgrumie in such a way, she seemed to all other extremely ridiculously. So Madleine Ralph looked in his room on the 3rd floor, did not find him. If she disturbs called up after the remaining, asked, that one the staff as far as possible should not bother. Sgrumie cursed to the 1st time that her hotel had 5 floors, ever needed more than they one day for himself and any guests. There only the look at the supervision cameras from the headquarters remained to her, but in the bath and in the toilets this supervision was impossible and also now this showed a big load. 5 security people were asked to search all baths and Sgrumie went through in thoughts the ways which her new friend had certainly taken. On his room he would have only been bored, so he might have stayed close to Pieter. And so she searched him in one of the baths which lay near of the children's room. Properly! The rushing water in a shower allowed to not only prick up the ears they, her blood pressure shot up upwards.
No, there were no costs which it possibly would give to regret, they would have made no difference in every case. The big island an orchard dar-put solar collectors at all possible places on the island, on the hotel roof, water treatment plants in the cellar, own care by a small farm and an orchard - then, actually, Sgrumie needed no help from Outside, but this here.
The strong woman did not shout out loud as it would possibly have done a squeamish partner when she discovered the undressed man in the fluent water. She was strong enough to pull him out, besides, from the shower, tried to speak him in, he did not react, but he had his eyes, fortunately, openly. Sgrumie switched off, besides, the water, carried her partner a small distance, did not consider long and registered, even besides, that this form “of me sees you the first time how God has created you” not at all this was what she would have wished.
What had happened, however?
Marianne `s soul simply left not laxly and also had still begun to run down Sgrumie in which she persuaded him that this Valkyrie would not be her successor, nevertheless, probably seriously. “For you there is no substitute, you know this, but.” Because he wanted to believe himself not ridiculously in which he further talked in the emptiness, he also did not react than she got anyhow to serve the music arrangement and a song sounded which had shown more or less the beginning of her respect:“ Too Much Love Will Kill You “and if one took this word for word, her love to him had killed them. From "queen" they had belonged together every song high and under it, had joined in the singing, had lain to themselves in the arms and all possible, besides, done. To rouse this mad time now in him, he was not able to indicate what she would still do everything, around him. Yes, what then? To agree, however, still there where she was? It was bad: after this song came almost everybody whom they knew, so that he did not know how to help himself differently, than to take a shower, warm, hot, tepid and finally to turn cold water on to let go, he washed of course, besides, however was aware that this torture would so fast come to no end by them, but what should he do then other, than to drown another by a noise? Other music?
Undressed he pottered about in the music arrangement, turned on different transmitters, then decided to throw any CD, it did not pay attention to the titles and took a shower further. He did not know meanwhile any more why. What he got to hear: "Sometimes" of Erasure, not exactly a new hit if one this year careful in 2000 and a little bit about that and he was not surprised here apparently still lay around even more older CD `s, generally CD s`, who used them?! Besides however, he was not able to drown those other noises because they seemed to come from him: her thoughts again and again. It was of use a little that he kept the ears to, sat down on the ground and decided, quite a while nothing at all to want, sometime this would end. The soul gave up only him when it noticed that he only sat, did not move, however, the water rushed only icily on him. Even if he shook sleep of himself of the morning with pleasure with cold water, thus long - more than 3 hours - he had never done this.
Sgrumie had him can dry up and lay in the bed, it disturbed them that he did not react to them and she requested for Madleine and for RF, nevertheless, they may come to her.
RF was a little more calm than both women together if him the state, nevertheless, anyhow with him frightened relatives. “Give to him time to recover, no notion what he has experienced passes here absolutely nothing if one refrains sometimes from the theatre what Marianne `s soul organises, around him.” “Nevertheless, this is probably enough that she risks everything to do him either to the suicide, or wants to make him mad, is the love from On the other side?” Sgrumie had taken irritable the first-best object and had thrown him to ground, just that CD, which he to End had belonged. Sgrumie looked the cover surprises itself. “You have none of mine, possibly?” “We have wasted no time to take still music with, but how and who.” You also saw Marianne taking no music...
They took up all help which came up to them, among the security people were even orderlies, taken out of service doctors who had struck though unique by alcohol abuse, but this was level once closed and this could prove themselves here again what they also did too with pleasure.
And now this room resembled the space in a hospital, the man dawned in the half sleep before himself, Sgrumie, RF and Madleine looked always and constantly, when he would be better, finally, to one of the doctors asked for it, one may be patient. One shifted work again on sometime later, they sat together, brooded, walked around worriedly, also outside. Madleine swam only in the just small forest lake in which one had discovered Marianne they knew no fear in her life, in any case, not around her own. Beside her the water curled when it looked around then, she saw from Nothing a waterfall behind which the clear face of Marianne was recognizable sadly, too sadly. Madleine lay down on the back, can be done and talked to itself: ”You just need it to be sad. Is it not more pleasant there than here in, nevertheless, to complicated real world? If you do not grant to him what he has now: a new woman and your child who should not find out, nevertheless that the mother wanted to make the father mad?” “I do not want this at all, I lack him thus.” “Clear that is easy to understand, also understands us, we will protect him with all means against you if it must be, but the work which also you have wanted what becomes from that? We also wanted to dedicate them to you partially, but now has become no matter.” Madleine lied audaciously, none of them thought in the dream of this kind of dedication, the soul reacted moved. “I do not know whether I get to do something else, than only to observe, I am able to do it try.” The waterfall disappeared and the soul with. Madleine hastened to come from the water, dried itself cursorily and returned. She briefly consulted with RF and Sgrumie and already wanted to establish communication with the other world than to her it seemed just quite besides, she traipsed nervously around, also observed Sgrumie
She remembered of course who was here the boss: not one of the doctors or security people, but they. She had not forgotten this, had edged out only for the moment because she depended on help of the people who counted to her staff. One had neither thrown out them of the room nor would find them this close and she quietly entered, about evening and them felt neither a sort of hunger nor was there a need for sleep.
Strangely enough she found 2 doctors at the table, maps playing, one, however, looked very carefully, wrinkled the forehead over and over again, until she seized him in the arm and moved aside. “What has happened there?” “A usual person would have taken the ice-cold water not long so well, he has only a little bit high fever what is over till tomorrow certainly.“ “Of course he is just no usual person, meanwhile everybody knows this.” “Mistress misunderstand me. Here,” he passed to her a thin panel which one could push under the microscope, she did not recognise at first sight a lot. “these changed cells are found not only in the blood, a new gene, so to speak. One could call it the gene for a medical miracle, because this man can attack what always it would be, he will not die.” “Not so easily or?” Ice-cold water endure where he did something in the kind just not every day, nothing appeared to her special and it was not fine also, however. The man shook the head. “He can never die, even if he should wish this sometime, this will seem to him sometime like a bad dream, from however, there is no awakening. The ice-cold water has got going so much new processes in his body, not only to protect him, possibly that he can look a little younger soon.” “Now even more recently than now already, it must not be really.” However, this thought they only, already wanted to go when her friend asked them suddenly to remain still. “Or do I hold you from something?” She shook the head, sat down to him on the bed, felt somewhat confused for his narrow hand and laid them to her own cheek. She did not like the glowing-hot at all, all the more it was surprised that he smiled only weakly and said: ”Is never pushed shut to me, I can be frightened by a chimera and simply break down in such a way, to morning I will be probably better, does not disturb you so much, dear.”
Unpleasantly it became to him that the peculiar woman who also exercised a strange charm worried and was apparently ready to remain also the long night. These thoughts let them nod. “I can imagine what could come, therefore, I remain so long as it is necessary.” A little bit hard this sounded and tolerated no opposition, neither from the man who became slowly more and more tired, nor from the present people of her staff.
“Recover now well, possibly that we can do everybody soon, finally, sometimes what what you will like.” She waved over, one may reduce the light, it happened, she sat down more relaxed there in the armchair. While her friend spent the night worriedly, she dropped off over and over again, then was shaken, however, awake by RF and Madleine. “Lie down, finally, in your bed, Madleine will sit down, till present she has slept.” Sgrumie also needed this and she still observed 2 doctors who talked lively, were almost to according to. When she got closer, these fell silent embarrassed. “Now?” She nodded to the old person, he may report what to her.
“I wanted to examine the dead body thoroughly, yes, I know, you have not arranged and it also did not go, because she is really dead not really. One must compare this to the hibernation which an animal can make. Everything what is not in her body in order is her heart, the woman herself seems to sleep like Sleeping Beauty if the comparison is permitted. Their heart has broken, accepts sometimes, from her former partner. If is, however, only one very careful, unseemly supposition which is not entitled to me, but one has said me that they estimate it if one also supposes sometimes.” Now, nevertheless, Sgrumie had to sit down again. “Your body cannot rot?” “He would not become it also beyond the chill unity in the cellar if you yourselves want to see?” “No, now not, how sure is it that one can recall them again to the right life?” “Not very certainly, but also her cells cannot die, just as his not and of mister franc field also not.” It was a matter this nightmare to take and Sgrumie thanked monosyllabic, went to bed.
Of course she had given in the water to the security people the order to examine Mariannes body, but she had not been present herself. Madleine was able and would not ask them yet and RF? Why was condemned also to survive all those which he loved?
About morning Madleine woke up them. Sgrumie was wide awake immediately and enquired after her partner. “He is better again, afternoon, assured the doctors, he may get up, he sleeps a lot.” Madleine rather hid from her as it had had to calm the unhappy man over and over again who asked feverish for help, almost the whole night the doctor's team on trot had held. He had asked strangely enough neither for Sgrumie nor for Marianne, however, passed by the more time, the more quietly he became, until he fell asleep, finally. Sgrumie saw the shades around Madleine `s eyes around, anticipated more than she knew. “We know both what is with the men and Marianne, I suppose sometimes?” “Now I also know, what Marianne wants: her body have or in him back. How can a heart break?” “This introduces to me thus: by the grief which one experiences over and over again anew must experience or which one even pretends, Marianne was extremely jealous of every woman at whom he smiled just very friendly. And which woman does not react there.”
To both women it was almost clear that it returned no way for Marianne, they went over to Ralph who still slept deeply. Sgrumie was only startled when somewhere in a room corner a bottle rolled around, she lifted.
The bottle had of course no label. Because one produced here all drinks himself which were eatable without alcohol, one also did not need this. Sgrumie led her nose to the opening and an alcoholic smoke met her who brought her the blood to the cooking or almost. Since for the staff absolute alcohol ban, only surely here, in this room existed. “For it there is probably none Excuse me, whom must I send back on the mainland?!” Embarrassed silence, then, finally, an orderly resolved to talk. “It is clear to all what you mean, but the man has floated at no time in mortal danger, still today he can leave the bed.” “I have not meant this, must I count now also in the OP - luckily we did not have this case yet - with drunk staff? How it is generally possible.”
Cheap rotgut was not level it, the aroma beguiled them oddly enough, but this did not calm them. She called a man of the security team with the request to bring a device for puffing and one may take from all people who had looked after the man blood. “Those which were alcoholized may soon perform to the cleansing troop society, any more I do not say first of all.”
Besides, she gave them an almost happy smile and observed the effect.
The persons present could still count themselves happy there, because with a bad report of Sgrumie a new beginning on the mainland would become virtually impossible.
“I do not feel like absolutely welcoming novices here and now one may bring forward to me where and how the stuff was brewed.”
A lab assistant offered to bring them in that floor in which one had mixed unauthorised drinks together. Still under that sleepy floor which she had called superfluous-wise "arrest floor" or one could also say prison in addition, the stair was millimetre-high covered with dust, then there came a lift, the Sgrumie had never used. “The lift also only starts here, steps aside not down, but.” Sgrumie had stayed only in certain floors and those rooms just did not lie there quietly, in them what was mixed just anew: Beer or also wine, in any case, mawkishly. “A new liqueur if want to try mistress.” “A little bit audaciously, or not?” Apparently your staff had too much time or she had been too good-natured during all years. She had a look at container, in a liquid herumschwamm which existed of unknown ingredients. “Natural product: Beer from bananas, oranges, tangerines.” “Indeed very healthy.” Mockingly she lasted after a very small bottle, tried. The liqueur which was not to be excelled in his loveliness any more which allowed to sound almost a melody in her they meant at a distance to feel coming up all minds to himself. You kicked tears in the eyes and she had never cried, neither as a child, nor as a young woman and now it seemed time for this kind of emotional outburst. Grief and distraught state, flight of fear and worry, all this. She knew up to now only bitterness and if it laughed, then rather roughly, almost manly. The liqueur which unearthed the really female from her inside? Annoyingly she wanted to smash the bottle, however, controlled itself. “Now. Under the condition that all rosters are presented or my assistant to me from now on I decide over here still nothing at all.” The assistant brought back them to Madleine and RF.
Afternoon and Sgrumie had gone in from that moment when it had come out again of the confidential lab unity for some sports, her fury in the water raved out, had also been near the wall of fog. Mariannes soul did not meet her for the time being. Ralph expected them how one said her, on the beach, he had made it to himself in one of the deck chairs comfortable. Quietly she approached him in the acceptance, he would have fallen asleep, but he was wide awake. The sun seemed his face with a strength which one did not experience on the mainland so fast and became too intensive for usual people. However, he smiled rather pleasedly, a little bit boyishly stupid came up in him what he could not arrange, because of course nobody had told him the supposition: possibly that he would become younger. Sgrumie was afraid of this moment, sat down on the sand, drew the knees.
“You are it, how long wanted you still to keep waiting me?” Strict this did not sound, cheerfully he bent to her, she moved in his arms, inhaled her smell: harsh, female still, the warmth of her brown skin felt. “It goes well to you really again?” Anxiously she looked at him, he laughed. “Of course and I would like to do the next hours only one: at you look.” Besides, Sgrumies hair were ruffled, the legs sandy, her loose shirt dribbled round just her thighs, but the wiry of her appearance - just no gramme of fat - amazed the man over and over again. Sgrumie was so a full selfdoubt that to her made sense not immediately, why he wanted to look at them, she concentrated upon his eyes, before she laid her arms around him. Easily he carried them in the room which they had seen both already together and Sgrumie now experienced really how much strength was in him. She can be only done for hours, understood bit by bit that it was just not only her litheness which irritated him in her.
All rights belong to its author. It was published on e-Stories.org by demand of Meike Schrut.
Published on e-Stories.org on 08.01.2010.